Life as it is

I obviously have a drinking problem--but im not sure whether i care to fix it or not-it does sometimes make me obnoxious, i occasionally black out, i get all depressed, alcohol is fattening-and its too expensive of a habit. I suppose its kind of like smoking-i know its horrible for me and doesnt benefit me in any way, but i like to do it and it makes me feel good...so im not really positive that i do have the will power to quit--because despite all the crappy things that come along with drinking i do have a lot of fun, and have made some damn good memories doing it---i didnt really want this post to be about my drinking "problem", but i guess it is a current issue in my life. I live in michigan and am unemployed--despite all of my efforts...i would LOVE to have a job-but that would be a lot easier if i had a car, which i need a license for, which i need a job to get--and since i no longer live with my mom--who is broke as a joke anyways it all seems really impossible-but that wont stop me from trying! i had three interviews in a row a while back-then someone else got the job, but it really did lift my spirits even to come close--i thought i interviewed rather well and was very confident that i would get it...but even though i didnt it still gave me a sense of relief to feel so close to having a job, it made me feel a little bit like my efforts were paying off--i will have to keep trying but i know i will succeed and pull my life together :) In a couple of months i will have been with my current boyfriend for two years, which is rather exciting for me-he is the love of my life!!